Hey folks, there’s a ton of good stuff coming out on DVD / Blu Ray / HD / Laser Disc / 8 Track / Punch Card in the month of February. Here’s my picks!
The Abyss / Alien (Double Feature)
Here we have two of the coolest monster movies every made. One is about an alien creature up in space. The other is about an alien creature down in the ocean. To complete the trifecta someone should make a movie about an alien creature on the earth’s surface. Maybe it could have a telescopic neck and eat Skittles. That’s a movie I would go see for sure!
Brainstorm: Deluxe Edition
Brainstorm is the classic corporate motivational video about how to put your heads together in a business meeting to find workable solutions to every day market demands.
Dragonslayer (I Love The 80’s Edition)
This is not to be confused with the prono Dragons Layer (I Love The 80’s Edition) about a well endowed black knight who likes to stick his sword in octogenarians.
Eddie Murphy: Raw (I Love The 80’s Edition)
At the time of this classic comedy movie’s release in the early eighties it was the most fowl-mouthed, obscene, disgusting, four letter word laden film of all time. Until then, the most obscene thing on film was a rarely seen episode of The Andy Griffith Show where Barney tells Andy “Well, you can shove Aunt Bea’s fucking pecan pie up your redneck corn hole if I can’t have any, by gosh!”
Peter Sellers: 5 Film Collection
What can you say about legendary comedic actor Peter Sellers other than, “Holy shit he’s got 5 movies on this one DVD!” What’s amazing is that there’s not a single Pink Panther movie in the collection.
Young Sherlock Holmes (I Love The 80’s Edition)
The young Sherlock Holmes was far more effective in solving crimes than the old Sherlock Holmes who suffered from Alzheimer’s and was very, very gassy.
Back To The Future
Actually ALL 3 BACK TO THE FUTURE MOVIES are coming out this month, but I’m far too lazy to write about all there. Perhaps I’ll go back in time and write about the other two later.
Batman
This is the ORIGINAL Batman movie. And by ORIGINAL I mean the first good one.
The Guitar
I’ll be honest…I have no idea what the hell this movie is about, but being a guitar player myself, I can tell right off the bat that this is likely a great contribution to guitarists everywhere…most of whom are single and really need quality fapping material.
Living With The Mek
You don’t so much live with the Mek as you live in fear of the Mek. There is – I’m not making this up – a scene where the Mek turn one of the White Devil’s penis inside out…no joke. It’s a right of passage. A passage to kicking the fuck out of some Mek.
My Name Is Bruce
Let’s just bask in this. There’s nothing I can really add to it.
Rush Hour 1 & 2
A Black and a Oriental fighting crime. In their off time they do laundry for fried chicken restaurants. Lighten up! I’m just kidding.
Van Damme Four Feature Film Set
A Van Damme quadruple feature! It’s like being punched in the face by Van Damme’s fists and feet at the same time!
Batbabe: The Dark Nightie
Holy self stimulation Batman, I’m going to watch this movie until I dislocate my elbow!
